It's Lonely At the Top ... Or, Is It?

by candy barone Nov 20, 2023

As leaders, executives, entrepreneurs, and business owners, we often get told and believe that “it’s lonely at the top.” 

That the higher you go and grow, the more you stand alone.

It’s competitive, cut-throat, and a dog-eat-dog world. Only the best will choose to play the game, for it comes with great sacrifices and consequences. It’s a lonely game for those who survive.

This is the ongoing narrative assigned to leaders. The story slated for the entrepreneur who dares to risk it all and venture out on her own. It’s the way of success, the pathway to profits. Or, so we’ve been made to believe. 

What if, or better yet, imagine if … that wasn’t the case.

Because this narrative can be re-written. 

Imagine if, instead of feeling isolated, alone, and like the lone wolf out on a island by yourself, you could connect to other thought leaders just like yourself in more powerful and meaningful ways.

The reality is there are far more opportunities to lean in than you might think. More than ever, leaders need a safe space to be vulnerable, to get raw, real, and gritty, and to be able to discuss and navigate the very challenges presenting in light of how business and the landscape has changed over the past few years.

Often leaders, executives, and business owners think they have to keep showing up as superheroes — resilient and invincible on every level. That you need to carry the weight of it all, no matter what, and that success lies fully on your shoulders alone.

That you are the one responsible … responsible for your business, for your growth, for your team, for your clients, for your family … and, the list goes on and on. So many times, you take on this role to the detriment and extreme cost of your own sanity, wellness, and peace.

Not to mention, there is an extreme arrogance to that mindset. 

You feel like there isn’t anyone you can really lean on, that you are the only one who can do … well, everything. 

You believe that you need to keep wearing a brave face, a mask, holding it all together, and not letting all the pieces fall apart.

What I hear too often is that so many leaders also are losing sleep as they think about the unknowns, as they try to see around the corners and into their blind spots, as they assess and evaluate all the impact the past few years have had on their people, their business, and their own well-being.

So many leaders tell me, “Candy, do you really want to know what keeps me up at night? It’s the fear that what if, after all this, I find out I did more damage than good to the people I care most about … my family and my team … because I just didn’t know better or know what to do.”

And, many of those same leaders break down in that conversation. 

They have meltdowns, or let themselves go for just a moment where the world feels as if it comes crashing down. The weight they are carrying is palpable and it breaks my heart. 

They need to grieve, too. 

For many just need to be able to have safe, quiet place to “let their hair down” and just breathe. A moment to simply be human. 

Now, imagine if, for a moment … you, as a leader, had a sacred space to be seen, heard, valued, and respected, along with a space where you could just be human, and just be yourself.

Imagine if … ah, the power of possibilities. 

The power to see the reality in a different perspective. The power to open up access to a new way of approaching things, and to realize it doesn’t have to be this way. Imagine if … there was a way.

There is.

Actually, there are several powerful ways you can tap into these possibilities. It all starts by realizing that you do not have to go at this alone.

You do not have to take on the responsibility of everyone and everything. And, you absolutely do not have to carry all these challenges, unknowns, and built-up emotion by yourself. You need to lean on your team, on the who’s who can support you, on colleagues, peers, and your inner circle. 

For the cost when you choose to carry it all alone is far too big.

It impacts your health: your spiritual, mental, emotional, physical, and energetic well-being. It impacts your relationships, especially those at home. It causes sleepless nights, addictive behaviors in order to take the “edge off,” and creates imbalances in your nervous system, adrenals and body. It gets into your cells and your DNA. It feels heavy, dense and like you are drowning in despair, frustration, overwhelm, anxiety, and burn out.

Not a way to powerfully live your life, or lead your living legacy, at all. 

You are worth much more than that.

You are worth investing in bringing yourself back to life and to create real fulfillment, peace, joy, and freedom in your life. 

The ROI when you realize you don’t have to carry it all … is truly life-changing.

You get to reclaim your power and get your life back. You actually learn the meaning of balance and harmony in your life. You see solutions that never would have been possible before. You navigate around corners and blind spots with more ease and grace. You trust your team. 

And, you get challenged in your own thinking to expand beyond what you think is truly possible. You might ask, how is that really possible?

Well, first imagine if you could be part of a peer advisory group with other CEOs, executives, and business owners who are challenged with similar issues. Irregardless of industry, niche, or market, most leaders experience the same types of challenges, frustrations, and imbalances.

Next, imagine if in those peer groups, or masterminds, you could get raw, real, gritty, open, and vulnerable. Imagine if, you could feel seen, heard, valued, challenged, supported, and deeply respected. Imagine if you could simply be human, and share both your personal and professional truths.

Then, imagine if you also could work with an executive coach in an intimate capacity, one-to-one, to go ever deeper. To help you navigate the difficult realities and to vet out the topics that you could bring to address and solution with your advisory group. Someone who would support you, champion you, challenge you, and help hold you accountable.

Imagine if you could plug into powerful leadership and growth tools that were curated to meet the demanding needs and issues you constantly are facing. Imagine if all that was accessible anytime you needed it.

You see, simply by believing it is possible, those channels and pathways become real and available. It starts with making a decision to invest in yourself, and in your organization. 

Never has there been a more critical time. Leaders need to come together right now in powerful ways to support each other, to lift each other up, and to play a bigger, more impactful game together.

Long gone are the days of the lone wolf, the isolated CEO, and the detached business owner. We now are in a time to access a blank canvas, a new landscape, an expanded way to lead our living legacy … one of connection, community, and collaboration. One where we can rethink the future. 

So my challenge and invitation to you is this: Imagine if you gave yourself permission to explore what’s possible. 

Imagine if you ventured into a different way to feel supported in your business, in your life. Imagine surrounding yourself with other humble, hungry, heart-centered transformational leaders and what that would do for your business, and more importantly, for you personally.

Regardless of the path you choose, you will be able to navigate the courageous conversations that matter most, explore the possibilities to help you create powerful solutions to the current challenges you face, and then execute the work required to get the greatest return.

You’ll create circles of collaboration, greater impact, and truly stand in a place to lead your living legacy. Thus, accessing more balance, harmony, joy, fulfillment, and peace in your life and in your business.

Isn’t it time to imagine if … and, lean in?


If you’d like to know how to tap into these sacred spaces, let’s have a conversation about what that might look like for you. I build, facilitate, and create these containers for leaders to be able to come to the table with their peers (LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/candybarone/)

Be sure to access my FREE resource: How to Be a More Effective Leader

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