Let's Be Honest: Are You Half-Assing Your Life or Going Both Cheeks In?

by candy barone Dec 07, 2023

Ok, it’s high time we get honest with ourselves. Are you really going all in on the things that matter most, or … well, are you half-assing your efforts?

This question is one I pose with teams and groups. I start the discussion by showing a mindset cycle of potential versus results, and I ask the question: “Do you feel that most people are tapping into their full potential?”

I always get a unanimous and resounding “no” as a response. To which, I then follow up and ask: “Are YOU tapping into YOUR full potential?”

You see it’s easy to call out what others are not doing. It’s not always as easy to hold our own feet to the fire. And, the only way up is to first start with being open and honest with ourselves. This question usually leads to a feeling of the air being taken out of the room and silence. 

Yet, it is the question we need to explore, sit with, and truthfully answer. 

Are you tapping into your full potential?

My guess is no. Because the reality is that most of us are not using anywhere near our full potential in most cases. We are going through the motions, and often just cycling through the same things we’ve always done. We create cycles of insanity for ourselves, hoping to achieve different results by doing the same thing harder and faster. 

Once the energy dissipates a bit, I follow up these questions with a demonstration. I ask the group to reach their right arm up as far as they possibly can. I insist that they stretch as far as possible. Once I confirm with them that they are indeed stretching their arm above their heads as far as possible, I then tell them to raise it higher. 

Inevitably, everyone stretches their arm even further, as a result. 

Why does this happen?

It’s easy to explain actually. Human nature has us default to holding back, even if unconsciously. We have been deeply conditioned and programmed for reaction versus response. And, that reaction is based on our own sense of survival, stemming from a flight, fight, freeze reflex. 

We protect and guard ourselves. We armor up. We wait to make sure it’s safe before we even think about going all in. This keeps us playing small. 

We also attempt to tap into full potential from the wrong starting point. It’s like putting the cart before the horse. When you look at the model I walk teams through, the discussion usually begins at the point of tapping into potential itself. So, let’s play this out …

If we start at the box that holds our potential (illustrated in the diagram above), and we all agree that none of us are really tapping into our full potential, what would happen to the action we choose to take, as a result?

We half-ass the action we take, right?

Meaning we hold back, and keep some of our potential on reserve. So, we stick our toe in the water, without fully committing to taking the inspired action required for the results we desire most … therefore, once we do that, then what happens to the results we actually create? 

Naturally, we get half-ass results, as well. 

Which then fuels our sense of belief and confidence about what we are truly capable of. Which, then in turn, has us tapping into even less potential the next round. Our belief and conviction wanes, thus, so does our confidence. We repeat this cycle over-and-over again, perpetuating a cycle of half-assing our actions, meaning we also half-ass our results, and half-assing our dreams, our purpose, and ultimately our lives. 

Imagine if, instead, we flipped the model on its head. 

What if we started the process by tapping into our sense of belief and conviction, our well of courage about our own capabilities, and primed that well first? This is the strategy elite athletes and high-performers employ. They nurture and fuel the bucket of their own belief first. 

In doing this, they practice active and deliberate visualization. 

Think about how Michael Phelps, eight-time gold medal recipient, for instance, structured his training to set himself up for success. He used to create playlists that were timed for each of his swims. He would then mentally rehearse his time in the pool, stroke by stroke, envisioning everything from his arm movement to his turns at the end of a lap. 

In his visualization, he mentally constructed the pathways to success. 

He would imagine adjusting his arm length in his stroke, or the amount of friction and resistance he was created in the water with every move. He would shave seconds off his time simply by putting into practice his every calculated move and stroke. He practiced more in his mind than even the countless hours he spent in the pool. 

Michael Jordan, Kobe Bryant, and Walter Payton attested to similar strategies that helped make them the greatest athletes of all time in their respective categories. You see it follows the mindset of: “When you believe it, you will see it.” — which is a departure from the conditioning we receive that claims: “When you see it, you’ll believe it.”

We need to see it in our mind’s eye first, in order for it to manifest. When we prime the tank of our own belief and engage in the emotions that bring that to life in a meaningful way, we can conceive and achieve it.

Napoleon Hill said this best in his famous line: “What the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve”.

Now let’s come back to the mindset (potential) model once again. 

If we start by priming and tapping into our own belief about what’s truly possible, then tap into the fullness of our potential afterwards, imagine what would shift in the actual inspired action we choose to take. 

I have a client who said this best, when I talked about going full-ass in on the things that matter most. She added: “Yes, go both cheeks in.”

So, I want you to think about what your life and business might look like if you opted to go both cheeks in. What would change? What possibilities would you have access to? How would you show up differently?

Because until you go full-ass, both cheeks in, you will never know the power of your own potential or the greatest of the gifts you are here to share. My call to action: It’s high-time we went both cheeks in!


Rethinking and evolving our growth mindset is a key element to growing as transformational leaders. As such, be sure to access your copy of my FREE guide to help you activate and tap into your own potential, along with that of your team and organization: How to Become a More Effective Leader

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